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人与人之间需要沟通，沟通可以使我们多一些理解，多一些关爱，多一些鼓励；少一些摩擦，少一些责备……
This is a communications seminar1, Ah, I tricked you. If I would have said, “This is a communications seminar,” how many of you would have showed up? Yeah, that’s what I was afraid of, two, two instead of 300. Okay. The reason this is a communications seminar is because I believe that communication is the key to your Life. You might want to start your notes with the following phrase, and this is what the seminar is all about. Write down, “The quality of my life is the quality of my communication. The quality of my life is the quality of my personal communication.”
Here’s what I mean by this, in order to have any experience in life and know whetherit’s good or bad, you have to communicate with who—yourself. You see the quality of yourlife is how you communicate with yourself. Howmany of you have ever had a relationshipwhere somebody maybe left you? Anybody hadthat experience? Anybody here?
Now when that person leaves, you haveseveral ways to communicate with yourself. Thequality of your experience will determine howyou communicate about that situation. Youmight say, “I’m not good enough, so they left me,” Or you might say, “Thank God, they left, so they made room for somebody who is right for me,” It all depends on the way you communicate to yourself. That will determine how you feel, how you act, how you behave in your future. So to me the quality of your life is the quality of your communication. Number one with whom? Yourself. And number two with others.
Communication with others is what we all want. We want a sense of connectedness. You see, how many of you here would like to make a major difference in the world? Can I see a show of hands? How many of you would like to lie on the beach and get tan2? Does that cause a problem sometimes, right? Like part of you working to make a difference and the other part is going, “No， I want a tan.” Right? And you got this pull in between, right? And it doesn’t really exist.
How many of you out there would like to be totally financially independent? Can I see a show of hands? Great! How many of you also feel like sometimes in order to do that it seems like it took away from your sense of appreciation3 of others or your spirituality4? Any of you had that experience ever?
You see, but do you have to give both of those up, No, you can learn how to integrate5 them, you can have the best of both worlds. How many of you would love to have a totally one-on-one committed relationship with someone totally focused and monogamous6?How many of you would like to have something like that? Great. How many of you get attracted to all kinds of people?
Okay, does this create a problem? What’s it called“inner civil war”. Right? And what we want to show you is how to resolve that because that’s where the power is, the power comes when you know how to integrate yourself.
And as we work on that, the portion that you’ll be getting of my communication consciously7 will be the idea of the personal power of my background. That is if you look at human communication, you’ll find out that only seven percent of human communication is words.
今天是一次沟通讨论会，你们感觉受骗了吧?因为如果我说这是一次沟通讨论会的话，你们当中会有多少人能到场呢?我猜只有两个人，而不是现在的300人。那正是我所担心的。之所以说这是一次沟通讨论会，是因为我相信，沟通对我们每一个人都非常重要。如果你们想开始记笔记的话，不妨将下面几句话写下来，这也正是这次讨论会的内容。“沟通能力决定我的生活质量，我生活质量的高低取决于我个人沟通能力的高低。”
下面我会阐明我的观点，为了积累生活经验并学会明辨是非，你必须学会和某个人交流——这个人就是你自己。因为你的生活质量的高低取决于你自我沟通的好坏。你们当中有多少人曾经和某个人有过一段感情，然后这个人又离你而去呢?谁有过这样的经历，在这儿谁有?
当这个人离开的时候，你可以有好几种方式与你自己进行交流。你的经验会决定你如何去面对现实。也许你会说“我有很多缺点，因此他们选择离开我”，或者你会说“感谢上帝，他们终于离开了，这样我就可以选择更适合我的伴侣”。这些都取决于你和你自己交流的方式，它将决定你的感受如何、你的表现如何以及你将来会怎么做。所以对于我来说，沟通能力决定生活质量。和谁去交流？首先就得学会和自己交流，其次才是和他人交流。
我们都希望和他人沟通。我们都需要一种相互关联的感觉。你们在座的人中有多少人希望通过自己的努力去改变世界呢?举起手来让我看看好吗?你们当中有多少人希望躺在沙滩上享受日光浴呢?可有时这些想法会给我们带来问题，是吗?就像你的一半在工作，想改变世界的同时，另一半却说：“不，我想去晒日光浴，想晒黑一点儿。”对吗?这时你便处于进退两难的境地，对吧?其实这样的问题并不存在。
你们那儿有多少人愿意在经济上安全独立?举一下手让我看看好吗?好极了!你们当中有多少人也会感到，有时为了达到你的这个目标，你不得不去诋毁他人，而不是去欣赏他人，或是要被迫放弃自己的精神信仰呢?你们中有谁曾经有过这样的经历?
难道你们必须得把这二者全抛弃吗?不，你们可以学着如何把二者融为一体，你们能够让两个世界相处得极好。你们当中有多少人愿意洁身自好，对伴侣忠实，并希望伴侣也能和你一起维护一夫一妻的关系呢?你们当中有多少人愿意这样做呢?好极了。你们当中又有多少人是见谁爱谁呢?
行了，难道这没有制造什么问题吗?把它叫做——“内部的内战”怎么样?我们想要告诉你的就是如何解决这个难题，因为这才是能力所在。当你知道如何进行自我完善的时候，你就拥有了解决这个难题的能力。
当我们共同研究它的时候，你就会意识到，在这次演讲中，是我丰富的人生经历让你们从中获益。如果你回顾一下人类的沟通，你会发现,语言只占了沟通的百分之七。
朱家群 摘自Aviation
This is a communications seminar1, Ah, I tricked you. If I would have said, “This is a communications seminar,” how many of you would have showed up? Yeah, that’s what I was afraid of, two, two instead of 300. Okay. The reason this is a communications seminar is because I believe that communication is the key to your Life. You might want to start your notes with the following phrase, and this is what the seminar is all about. Write down, “The quality of my life is the quality of my communication. The quality of my life is the quality of my personal communication.”
Here’s what I mean by this, in order to have any experience in life and know whetherit’s good or bad, you have to communicate with who—yourself. You see the quality of yourlife is how you communicate with yourself. Howmany of you have ever had a relationshipwhere somebody maybe left you? Anybody hadthat experience? Anybody here?
Now when that person leaves, you haveseveral ways to communicate with yourself. Thequality of your experience will determine howyou communicate about that situation. Youmight say, “I’m not good enough, so they left me,” Or you might say, “Thank God, they left, so they made room for somebody who is right for me,” It all depends on the way you communicate to yourself. That will determine how you feel, how you act, how you behave in your future. So to me the quality of your life is the quality of your communication. Number one with whom? Yourself. And number two with others.
Communication with others is what we all want. We want a sense of connectedness. You see, how many of you here would like to make a major difference in the world? Can I see a show of hands? How many of you would like to lie on the beach and get tan2? Does that cause a problem sometimes, right? Like part of you working to make a difference and the other part is going, “No， I want a tan.” Right? And you got this pull in between, right? And it doesn’t really exist.
How many of you out there would like to be totally financially independent? Can I see a show of hands? Great! How many of you also feel like sometimes in order to do that it seems like it took away from your sense of appreciation3 of others or your spirituality4? Any of you had that experience ever?
You see, but do you have to give both of those up, No, you can learn how to integrate5 them, you can have the best of both worlds. How many of you would love to have a totally one-on-one committed relationship with someone totally focused and monogamous6?How many of you would like to have something like that? Great. How many of you get attracted to all kinds of people?
Okay, does this create a problem? What’s it called“inner civil war”. Right? And what we want to show you is how to resolve that because that’s where the power is, the power comes when you know how to integrate yourself.
And as we work on that, the portion that you’ll be getting of my communication consciously7 will be the idea of the personal power of my background. That is if you look at human communication, you’ll find out that only seven percent of human communication is words.
今天是一次沟通讨论会，你们感觉受骗了吧?因为如果我说这是一次沟通讨论会的话，你们当中会有多少人能到场呢?我猜只有两个人，而不是现在的300人。那正是我所担心的。之所以说这是一次沟通讨论会，是因为我相信，沟通对我们每一个人都非常重要。如果你们想开始记笔记的话，不妨将下面几句话写下来，这也正是这次讨论会的内容。“沟通能力决定我的生活质量，我生活质量的高低取决于我个人沟通能力的高低。”
下面我会阐明我的观点，为了积累生活经验并学会明辨是非，你必须学会和某个人交流——这个人就是你自己。因为你的生活质量的高低取决于你自我沟通的好坏。你们当中有多少人曾经和某个人有过一段感情，然后这个人又离你而去呢?谁有过这样的经历，在这儿谁有?
当这个人离开的时候，你可以有好几种方式与你自己进行交流。你的经验会决定你如何去面对现实。也许你会说“我有很多缺点，因此他们选择离开我”，或者你会说“感谢上帝，他们终于离开了，这样我就可以选择更适合我的伴侣”。这些都取决于你和你自己交流的方式，它将决定你的感受如何、你的表现如何以及你将来会怎么做。所以对于我来说，沟通能力决定生活质量。和谁去交流？首先就得学会和自己交流，其次才是和他人交流。
我们都希望和他人沟通。我们都需要一种相互关联的感觉。你们在座的人中有多少人希望通过自己的努力去改变世界呢?举起手来让我看看好吗?你们当中有多少人希望躺在沙滩上享受日光浴呢?可有时这些想法会给我们带来问题，是吗?就像你的一半在工作，想改变世界的同时，另一半却说：“不，我想去晒日光浴，想晒黑一点儿。”对吗?这时你便处于进退两难的境地，对吧?其实这样的问题并不存在。
你们那儿有多少人愿意在经济上安全独立?举一下手让我看看好吗?好极了!你们当中有多少人也会感到，有时为了达到你的这个目标，你不得不去诋毁他人，而不是去欣赏他人，或是要被迫放弃自己的精神信仰呢?你们中有谁曾经有过这样的经历?
难道你们必须得把这二者全抛弃吗?不，你们可以学着如何把二者融为一体，你们能够让两个世界相处得极好。你们当中有多少人愿意洁身自好，对伴侣忠实，并希望伴侣也能和你一起维护一夫一妻的关系呢?你们当中有多少人愿意这样做呢?好极了。你们当中又有多少人是见谁爱谁呢?
行了，难道这没有制造什么问题吗?把它叫做——“内部的内战”怎么样?我们想要告诉你的就是如何解决这个难题，因为这才是能力所在。当你知道如何进行自我完善的时候，你就拥有了解决这个难题的能力。
当我们共同研究它的时候，你就会意识到，在这次演讲中，是我丰富的人生经历让你们从中获益。如果你回顾一下人类的沟通，你会发现,语言只占了沟通的百分之七。
朱家群 摘自Aviation