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以八十八岁的高龄谢世,公木先生最后的消息传来,我没有更多的悲痛。血红的落日,缓缓下沉,溅起星光,谁也无力托起它。只是它自己的最后辉煌,独自迎送着它自身白发苍然的默然转化。而我的心中,一种突然的、巨大的遗憾,油然而生!在他与我之间,仅仅局限于两个人交往的历史中,本应该出现的、最真诚的探讨、诘问、内省,由于我单方面的怯懦、晚熟和地理上的距离,永远失去了发生的机会。今后,我只有空读他的诗书,枉然凝望他的留容。我提出的全部置疑,只能再次无力地折射回到我自已的困惑。作为热情的回答者和好斗的理论家,他,是那样优秀的辩论对手!作为某一种文化的苦难结晶,作为某一类标本一样纯正的性格,他,是那样的真实而矛盾!既然五十年的生命中,我一直苦苦地声称着真诚,既然我直至现在仍想问遍全世界而去寻找一个明白,我怎么能如此轻易地错失了良机?!这,也许是那段历史赐给我的唯一机会。我枉对了那么多人误认的、我的所谓勇敢与坦诚。
At the age of eighty-eight, the last news of Mr. Gong came, and I have no more grief. Blood sunset, slowly sinking, splashing stars, who are unable to hold it up. Only its own last glory, alone to greet its silent gray hair transformation. In my heart, a sudden, great regret, spontaneously! Between him and me, confined to the history of the interaction between two people, this should be the most sincere discussion, ask, introspection, Due to my unilateral cowardice, late maturity and geographical distance, I have lost my chances forever. In the future, I only have time to read his poetry, vainly staring at his memory. All the doubts I put forward can only once again be powerlessly refracted back to my own confusion. As a passionate answerer and combative theorist, he is such a good opponent of debate! As a kind of cultural suffering, as a purer character of a certain type of specimen, he is such a real and contradictory! Since I have been bitterly asserting sincerity for fifty years of life that since I still want to ask the world over to find an understanding, how can I miss the opportunity so easily ?! The only chance given me. I vain for so many people mistaken, my so-called courage and honesty.