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春节前夕,一个阳光灿烂的下午,笔者在北医六院见到了张津萼老师。张老师很忙碌,正和她的助手给一个孩子做心理治疗。笔者很惊讶地发现,在走廊里等待做心理治疗的病人竟有许多是孩子——初中生、高中生,抑或孩子本人没来,其父母替孩子前来咨询。有一个即将参加高考的女孩,焦躁不安,已经两个多月不能安然入眠了。另一个男孩,也即将参加高考,他母亲说,这孩子学习成绩一直很棒,从小学到初中总是年级前五名。上了高中后,成绩渐渐下降,高三已下降到年级十几名。年级十几名,这是很优秀的成绩。但他父母看到的只是他成绩的下降,并不满意,给孩子买了很多的教辅书,希望他能有一个飞跃。可是他们万万没有想到孩子突然变得很烦躁,不能看书,也不能睡觉。孩子的母亲叹息,他们现在对孩子已经没有过高的期望值,只要他能回到过去的状态,健健康康的,他们就心满意足了。还有一个初三男孩,聪明过人,可是就是不爱学习。父母自然很伤心,训斥有加。但令父母始料不及的是孩子不知从什么时候开始,拒绝和人沟通交往,包括父母同学,和谁都不说话。父母这下急了,不知如何是好。在治疗的间隙,张老师来到走廊上,耐心而温和地回答家长们各种各样的询问。张老师说,现在孩子的学习和其他各方面的压力都很大,特别是在少年时期,很容易出现心理疾病。如果家长有些心理学方面的知识,就可以防患于未然。本刊特约张老师给家长们讲讲如何才能做一个称职的家长,此期所刊为《称职父母训练》(中)。
On the eve of the Spring Festival, a sunny afternoon, I saw Zhang Jinli teacher in the sixth hospital of Beijing Medical University. Teacher Zhang is very busy and is doing psychotherapy with her assistant to a child. I was surprised to find that many patients in the corridor awaiting psychotherapy are children - junior high school students, high school students, or children themselves, whose parents came to consult with their children. There is a girl who is about to take the college entrance examination, restless, and I have not been able to sleep peacefully for more than two months. Another boy, who is about to take the college entrance examination, said his mother had always had a great academic performance and was always the top five in grades from elementary to junior high. After high school, grades gradually declined, the third year has dropped to grade more than a dozen. Grade a dozen, this is a very good result. However, his parents saw only the decline in his grades, not satisfied with the children bought a lot of supplementary books, I hope he can have a leap. But they never imagined that their child suddenly became irritable, could not read books, and could not sleep. The child’s mother sighed that they now have no high expectations for their children, and as long as he can return to the past state of health, they are satisfied. There is a third-year boy, clever, but just do not love to learn. Parents are naturally very sad, reprimanded plus. But what unexpected parents is that children do not know when to begin, refused to communicate with people, including parents and students, and who do not speak. Parents anxious, I do not know how to be good. In the treatment of the gap, Zhang came to the corridor, patiently and gently answer a wide range of inquiries parents. Teacher Zhang said that now children’s learning and other aspects of the pressure are great, especially in adolescence, it is prone to mental illness. If parents have some psychological knowledge, you can take preventive measures. Our special Zhang teacher to parents about how to be a competent parent, this issue is entitled “competent parent training” (center).